I need a shrink, a cup of coffee, and a person capable of making adult decisions- time now.

I have terrible luck with washing machines and dryers. One could choose between the $250.00 tried-and-true and basic model or the $1,300.00 model that does the washing, folding, and putting away for you. No matter what- they will only last about a year in my home. The most recent victims have been around for about a year. Starting 4 months ago I realized that I was having to send my loads through the dry cycle at least 3 times. By then there was a musty smell that dryer sheets were unable to cover up with the scent of lavender and vanilla.

It’s not that I wouldn’t replace them- it was that I wasn’t looking forward to the battle of getting it into the designated space. It was the fact that Jack Frost did a number to my home this past winter and I just pulled all my retirement to repair gutters, ice breaks, and decking boards. The fence should have probably been replaced as well, but a cleverly placed bungee strap is holding it together for now. 

And now I am leaving. The damn dryer just needed to do its job until I was finished washing the curtains and bedding. 

Throughout this last-minute move to the lower 48, I have held my shit together well. I haven’t complained during any of my 60 trips to the dump. Although my dried-out hands are now bleeding from all the bleach that I have used in the hope that the baseboards will turn white again, I haven’t cried. I have not questioned why we have kept junk mail and advertisements for replacement windows for the past three years. 

Yet the dryer is about to send me over the waterfall because it is acting like a spoiled teenager!

It is always the small things in life- never the big ones- that send me into a tailspin of depression and despair. Driving four days pulling a 12×8 trailer with all my worldly goods and two dogs? No problem! No cell service for two of those days and only 2 gas stations between interior Alaska and the U.S. border in Washington- bring on the challenge! Have only hope and a prayer for a decent job when I arrive? Child’s play!

What if the dryer I intended to replace anyways in 11 days doesn’t work? Call the shrink and get me an emergency appointment. 

I am trying not to question my life decisions right now- but if I can’t keep a washer and dryer alive for more than a year…shouldn’t I need adult supervision at all times?

The list of things to get done is growing every day- not shrinking like I thought it would be.

I still have 1139 more window sills to clean. 3562 mosquitoes that have decided to make my house their home need to die. 116 more books need to be packed. My very expensive fake Christmas tree still needs to be decided on- does it go into my trailer and consume valuable space or does it get sold to a deserving family for a very low price of- ‘just come pick it up, please?’ Do I love my pots and pans, which are a collection of different sets from the past 10 years, or do I ditch them all and buy a set that doesn’t peel in the dishwasher?

I sold my lawn mower and then realized that I needed to mow my lawn…that has become a bit of an issue.

My parents said that I could pre-stage household items in their garage that I am ordering from Amazon. I haven’t had the heart to tell them that I ordered a full living room set- complete with a couch, loveseat, lazy chair, T.V. stand, an upgraded bed for my youngest, and an outdoor living area. Do you think they will notice?

I wanted everything that needed to be thrown out and disposed of, gone by the end of today. So I am fortifying myself with two pots of coffee, Advil, and I have a bottle of wine chillin’ in the fridge…wish me luck. 

Published by Rose Geer-Robbins

One does not simply become a famous writer! It takes many hours before the sun comes up and even more when the sun sets. I am never sure what world I am living in, the one that I am writing or reality.

One thought on “I need a shrink, a cup of coffee, and a person capable of making adult decisions- time now.

  1. Do you think our appliances are genetically linked? Our dryer died Thursday night.

    Sent from my iPhone – bev…

    >

    Like

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